Unidentified Griefcases

encouragement to claim emotional baggage

Who decided to call it ‘Emotional Baggage’

and not ‘Griefcase’?

〰 Nitya Prakash 〰

Nathan Dumlao_Peter Herrmann on Unsplash

The Suspicious Griefcase

Humans are the only emotional beings who wish not to be emotional.

〰 Martha Nussbaum 〰

A friend once called me in a state of emergency. Something had happened, and it had triggered an overwhelming tidal wave of emotions.

A few questions revealed that there was no actual threat. Nothing ‘real’ was putting her or her family in acute danger. A surge of emotions had been activated in her heart, brain or nervous system, flooded her whole body > mind > soul, and these emotions were having a real impact on her experience of life.

In the world of my grandparents such an event would have been labelled and dismissed as hysteria. They might have called it ‘mental instability’. Such emotional sensitivity was an unfortunate disposition, which, in those days, afflicted mainly women, allegedly.

Emotions were still perceived with great suspicion by my parents and their contemporaries. In my childhood, emotional sensitivity was regarded as a weakness. Negative emotions had to be controlled.

‘Emotional intelligence’ had just been discovered, but hardly anybody knew about it, yet.

About 400 years earlier ~ around the time when René Descartes spoke the famous words “cogito ergo sum” [= I think therefore I am] ~ influential thinkers decided that the Intellect was the most important function of the human mind (or Consciousness).

The Instinct, which is responsible for our emotions, was declared ‘outdated’. Emotions were believed to be ‘expressions of our animal nature’, and humans were supposed to learn to overcome their ‘lower inner beast’.

In the mid 20th century, around the time when the Intelligence Quotient was introduced, several psychologists began to recognise the value of emotional intelligence. The term was later popularised by Daniel Goleman, in his bestselling book Emotional Intelligence, published 1995.

Another influencing factor for the human relationship with their emotions is a certain type of popular spirituality. Some call it the ‘cult of optimism’. Adherents promote positive thinking at all cost, which is supposed to guarantee positive emotions.

Endorsers, apparently, include the Dalai Lama, who wrote somewhere that ‘happiness is our life’s purpose’. Several eminent spiritual teachers, including the scientist and Buddhist monk Matthieu Ricard, focus their work on teaching ‘happiness as a life-skill’.

This can be confusing, because normal people like you and me might think they are ‘not spiritual enough’ ~ or we are not on track with our life’s purpose ~ if we feel unhappy now and again.

Meanwhile, in the rumour-kitchen of the vernacular, emotional intelligence boiled down to having ‘positive emotions’ and showing ‘empathy with fellow humans’. The effects (of yet another misunderstanding) are as powerful as they are devastating:::

Covering up authentic negative emotions with ‘positivity’ became trendy and is still sometimes considered a ‘sign of inner strength’.

Identifying as an ‘empath’ went viral, regardless of genuine ability to acknowledge one’s own emotions, never mind understanding the feelings of others.

Ken Cheung on Unsplash

Inner Movement Spilling Out

Every bad feeling is potential energy

toward a more right way of being

if you give it space to move toward its rightness.

〰 Eugene Gendlin 〰

Emotion [from Latin ex = outward + movere = to move] was adopted into English in the 1570s in the sense of ‘social moving, stirring, agitation’.

The current meaning of internal agitation has been used since the 1650s.

Negative emotions are usually unwanted and rejected. They are often blamed on external adverse circumstances, unfortunate events or other people who are rude, inconsiderate or so-called ‘haters’.

The assumption behind this concept is that we can in fact rid ourselves of our own bad feelings by dumping them on someone else or into an unspecified zone of our external environment.

Our intellectual property is very precious to us. We have constructed a complex legal system to protect original ideas ~ born of the creative human mind ~ with patents, trademarks, and copyrights.

💭 {in reality, the legal system doesn’t protect our creative stuff. Only large sums of money do}

So why are we neglecting and rejecting our emotional property?

💭 {the fact that emotions are essential fuel to stoke the fires of the creative human mind seems to be stuck in a persistent blind spot in Western human Consciousness}

Scores of new methods have been invented, promising to reduce or eliminate negative emotions. Providers of online courses offer programs to help us ‘get rid of emotional baggage’.

💭 {the idea of emotional elimination may look as reasonable to us today as the overt emotional repression sounded to our ancestors}

After a brief moment in the limelight ~ when emotional intelligence received some potential recognition, in theory ~ our emotional property has been buried hastily, again, under glazes of ‘scientific proof’ and rational explanations, to reestablish the monopoly of the Intellect as the mental superpower of human Consciousness.

The reasons are understandable. This hostile approach, however, is not sustainable. It perpetuates a stressful and ultimately destructive inner war between authentic experience and the spurious offspring of human self-perception.

USGS on Unsplash

Emotions as Geological Upheavals of Thought

Perhaps it is like lifting weights,
the way we learn to carry grief.
At first we cannot lift it at all,
crushed as we are beneath it.

〰 Rosemerry Wahtolla Trommer 〰

American philosopher Martha Nussbaum recognises that all attempts to get rid of our emotions, as promoted by our ancestors, have been futile. “We will have to grapple with the messy material of grief and love, anger and fear….” she writes in her book Upheavals of Thought: The Intelligence of Emotions

“Emotions are not just the fuel that powers the psychological mechanism of a reasoning creature,” Nussbaum explains, “they are parts, highly complex and messy parts, of this creature’s reasoning itself…. Emotions should be understood as ‘geological upheavals of thought’: as judgments in which people acknowledge the great importance, for their own flourishing, of things that they do not fully control.”

In other words, our emotional property is still largely unknown to us.

Our emotions…

are difficult or impossible to control

can be very messy

are important for our own flourishing

tend to interfere with the world we know

This is disturbing, especially for the Intellect ~ the No. 1 faculty of the Western mind, which has been trained to control everything.

Carolina Munemasa on Unsplash

Our Emotional Property

In our unpacking process, we must own it before we can disown it!

〰 Evinda Lepins 〰

Let’s take a closer look at some of the messy and scary movements that unsettle the deeper geological strata of the human inner world.

Anger [from Old English enge = narrow] c. 1200, in English originally a verb, meaning to irritate, annoy, provoke.

The noun anger has been used since mid 13 c. in the sense of agony, anguish, distress, suffering. It is cognate with the English words anxiety, anxious, and anguish, the German Angst and the term angina in medical jargon.

Angina [from Latin angina = infection of the throat << from Greek ankhonē = a strangling] 1570s, severe infection causing a sensation of constriction in the throat. From 1744 also angina pectoris, “acute constricting pain in the chest”.

Angst [from German Angst = fear] used since 1944 in a psychological sense of “neurotic fear, anxiety, guilt, remorse.” Angst was popularized in English in early 20c. through translation of the writings of Sigmund Freud.

Anguish [from Latin angustia = tightness, narrowness, straitness] was introduced into English c. 1200 in the sense of acute bodily or mental suffering.

Angustia is derived from the Latin verb ang(u)ere = to throttle, torment; choke, squeeze.

Anxiety [from Latin anxius = uneasy, troubled in mind] adopted in English in the 1520s in the sense of “apprehension caused by danger, misfortune, or error, uneasiness of mind respecting some uncertainty, a restless dread of some evil.”

From the 1660s onwards anxiety was sometimes considered a pathological condition of distress.

Anxious [from Latin anxius] derived from angere = to choke, squeeze etc. used in English since the 1620s in the sense of greatly troubled by uncertainties. The meaning “earnestly desirous, as in anxious to please” is recorded from 1742.

Fear [from Old English fær = calamity, sudden danger, peril, sudden attack] is related to Old Saxon far = ambush, Old Norse far = harm, distress, deception, German Gefahr = danger.

The German Gefahr is a noun derived from fahren = to drive, go, ride, travel, move by carriage, cart, bicycle, horse etc. We may assume that the German Gefahr and English fear developed in the context of travelling, or moving from A to B, which holds more risks and unknown dangers than remaining in one place.

Grief [from Latin gravere = make heavy, cause grief] in English since early 13 c. in the sense of “hardship, suffering, pain, bodily affliction.”

Contemporary meanings of grief: intense mental distress caused by bereavement; unfortunate outcome, mishap, trouble, annoying behaviour. Good grief! (= exclamation of surprise, dismay, etc.) from 1912.

Sorrow [from Old English sorg = grief, regret, trouble] is originally defined as sickness with worry.

As a verb sorrow means to feel sad, be sad, grieve; to think of with sorrow.

The German equivalent Sorge is described as an internal pressure, agonising sensations of the soul; sadness, mourning, grieving over past present or future misfortune.

Sorge can be translated as: anxiety, apprehension, care, concern, disquiet, distress, headache, parental care, preoccupation, problem, solicitudes, sorrow, trials and tribulations, trouble, worries.

The German verb sorgen primarily means to take care of someone or something, to care for, provide for, which leads to the secondary meaning to be concerned, worry, be troubled by anxious thoughts.

No wonder those ‘geological upheavals of thought’ can make us feel weighed down, smothered, squeezed, stifled, restricted, squashed! No wonder we want to fight back, keep them out of our lives, or at least at bay…

Engin Akyurt on Unsplash

Claiming Emotional Baggage

This great upheaval is necessary before the next step can be taken.

〰 Eileen Caddy 〰

This brief excursion into some of the strata of the inner underworld may explain why emotions consume so much of our energy, resources, and attention. On the other hand, it also illustrates, I hope, how important our emotions are as natural renewable resources. And how valuable they can be.

Negative emotions have been known to save human lives. Literally.

If we just remembered this fact each time a shitload of bad feelings hits the fan, wouldn’t that change everything?

Instead of getting swamped and overwhelmed by the fuel that powers not just our ‘psychological mechanisms’, but the entire organism of human Consciousness, and ultimately our whole life, we must find a way to use that precious inner power for our benefit.

How can we learn to stop worrying about how to get rid of that ‘inner mess’ and instead take care of our unwanted emotions?

I know, even the thought of it can be scary. Thinking of ‘negative emotions’ instantly breeds negative emotions.

The solution is deceptively simple. The first step is a rational decision, born from deeper (or higher) understanding.

At first sight, claiming our ‘griefcases’ seems to add to our troubles. That’s a misconception. A logical fallacy. It’s not the emotions that trouble us. It’s the stubborn belief that the Intellect must suppress, oppress, repress whatever we don’t (yet) understand...

What if…

emotions are only the messengers

real trouble is brewing elsewhere

…?…?

Whenever fear of the unknown shows up ~ obviously without clear rhyme or reason ~ the deep rooted belief that we must eliminate ‘irrational fear’ kicks in. This triggers the Intellect and sends a signal:: Reject the unknown!

In an instant the ‘reasonable’ Intellect switches off his innate skills of logic and ration. He morphs into the proverbial rabbit in the headlights and makes us forget that new discoveries are only made, when humans have the courage to explore terra incognita.

The age-old error lies in anthropocentric attempts to control our internal geological movements. The collective human Intellect has not yet understood that this inner fuel shows up, initially, in its raw format ~ like any natural resource.

Since our messy emotions already live within us, because they are part of our experience ~ part of who we are at any given moment ~ there is nothing more de-lightful, en-lightening, and re-lieving than unpacking our personal baggage.

In their refined form, emotions are the most sublime (in the sense of elevating) and uplifting resources. To own them are the birthright of every human. But first you have to claim and identify them as your personal property. Which requires courage*.

Courage to be authentic.

Courage to be yourself.

Courage to meet yourself in the darkest corners of your inner world ~ the bottomless pits where emotions are known to appear as inner demons, dragons, and monsters.

*Courage [from Old French corage = heart, innermost feelings; temper] is not an emotion; it is a core-word with a strong affinity to emotions ~ to be explored in another wordcast.